How this all works...

Bio mom was supposed to be coming today for her last weekly visit, but of course she cancelled and wanted to make it for next week, but I told her no. we cant set the precedent that her visits are at her whims.



Of course the court is the one who made the choice as her rights were taken and not signed away. So technically from now until our adoption is final there is a no contact no information except with our approval. After the adoption is final we have a verbal agreement to maintain contact.

Our verbal agreement is that I'll send texts and picture updates and she can see her twice a year at her own expense. I will not be hunting her down, reminding her, or making any transportation arrangements. Additionally those visits are 3 hours long each, are preset to occur at her birthday and Christmas and NOT randomly when she sees fit to change them. The thing is, there is no binding agreement to this, so it's all because we feel that since there was not any abuse, she should be allowed to still know her. If there comes a time when things just aren't working, we will cross that bridge when we or if we have to.

Today CPS is coming to sign off on her case and move her to the adoptions team.

Severed Parental Rights

It's official our "at risk" placement has officially become a pre-adoptive placement. Her case transfers next week to a new adoptions case manager and we then just wait for the court date this summer. Probably end of July beginning of August.

A tad confused...

I mentioned to our day nurse about a set of sisters that were in care. Next thing I know I get an email from our new agency that she got a request for a staffing for them for us? What? Then she says that she's concerned about our home stability with bringing in too many children at one time.

First, I have no idea what the hell just happened because I never called anyone and secondly, it's been almost 3 months since we got Miss E and IF we go through with Mr C, because yes of course there are issues with that. It won't be until June. Ummm... How any other places get months between each placement? Not even my friend. I'm not exactly sure what she means.


Then about 30 minutes later we get another vendor call email. First I'm pleased with the agency and their available placements. Second, I'm kinda mad at what he assumes.

Half of a day....maybe less

We have been with our new agency 1/2 of the day....and we already received a vendor call placement request. Seriously! I'm not sure I will say yes to this one, but as soon as she found out we only had one placement, not even two hours later there was an email in my inbox with a prospective placement and its not even Friday.

Does it feel like loss or rejection?

Understandably some people know mr c better than we do. They talk about how he doesn't like change. How he'll need a long transition. How he has had a lot of loss in his life, combined with a lot of rejection. So what happens when you tell him you finally find the family he wants, then he gets to visit them, then they bring him back over and over again? He said to me, " I just want to get out of here, I just want a family." Does it look like rejection to him if we keep bringing him back because I am not really understanding this and don't want to cause him unneeded pain either as we move forward. I guess we will see what happens over the next few weeks and go into the CFT (child family team) meeting with a better understanding of him.

Transitions

New agency called and said that we should be transitioned next week. Hopefully we will get that bed filled with a foster placement. We are also up for license renewal and will open the third placement spot with the renewal which technically is for Mr. C .


Renew my license you say? But we just did. Well technically we only changed licenses. Yup took that long to do a simple switch and we have to start the whole process again for renewal. Wtf?

Lots of Slowgress

I can't call it progress but there was some major drama surrounding the most recent happenings around here. "C" is the new letter in our foster/adoption vocabulary, perhaps it may even come with the letter "J" but for right now the drama and how we got today's Redfile/Information meeting was hive producing stress evoking.

So a month or more ago, not sure now it all kinda runs together, well my friend was contacted about a little boy. She knew that she wasn't going to be able to take him so she suggested us. No call from our current licensing agency, a vendor call had not been placed out for him either. So I was looking at the Heart Gallery and I saw this little boy and contacted his agency. Low and behold it was the same little boy from before. So we continued to find out more and put our names into the hat for selection.

Of course we were chosen to be considered, then all forward progress hit a MAJOR wall. We are changing agency. Our current agency however still holds our adoption certificate. Our new agency doesn't do adoptions just placements, but once the child is placed you can still adopt. So a lot of back and forth and the agency that hold our certification 100% refused to attend the staffing. Why should they when they don't get credit for the placement? Or funding... ok I guess I can see that... but where does that leave us? More importantly where does that leave this little boy???

Advocating for children starts in full swing and we aren't even his parents yet. But I had to climb the ladder up the State's Official Child Protective Agency to get this done. Yes I did contact his DDD and CPS supervisors and bypass the adoption recruiter and both of our agencies to do this. But do this I did.

I sent them my license, I sent them my homestudy, I sent them my adoption certificate, and today we are going to present ourselves infront of a panel selection committee to sell why we think we'd be the best placement for "C"

Wish us luck! But dang, since they saw how hard I fought just to get this meeting, well that has got to tell them something.