"I" Update

Still plugging along with the every weekend visits. I am submitting my mileage for reimbursement, I have only received the first check so far, I am submitting another one this week, but despite her being a Foster Child and technically this qualifying for every weekend DDD Respite, we are not getting much beyond gas money. Right now it's about $120 round trip minimum. We also take time off from work to do the back and forths, and do not have any paid time off for these.

She has started calling us Mamma and Dada now. She'll be in the car or at breakfast or whenever I am not holding her and she call out, " Mamma, Mamma." I say "Hi" she says "Hi" back and blows kisses. As soon as she hears Hubby's voice she turns her head and blows kisses and says Dada. If that is not a child who is becoming bonded I don't know what is.

At the last drop off she was singing, talking, and laughing. But when FM came she put her head down and stopped talking. The CPS worker saw this. Because she was even talking to the CPS worker when she did it.

I have so little hope that things are going to go our way, but we are still moving forward as if she will be our daughter and getting to know her and have irrevocably fallen in love with her.

Court is only two weeks away now, next weekend is the last weekend visit. I start my new job the Monday following court, which is M-F 8a to 5p and I will not be able to continue to do the back and forth drives any longer, so they need to make a decision at that time.

Prayers, thoughts, blessings, anything you got is welcome! Apparently when I was "back home" with the family this weekend they were very shocked at the way I talked about her. They honestly said they weren't expecting me to be so bonded to her already, but they said they could see me light up when I talk about her. I showed off videos and pics, that I can't share via social media, so everyone got a lot of Little Miss "I".