Do you hold a grudge

Against bad behavior or do you brush it off and move on? It's so hard to do that sometimes. You want to do fun things, but inevitably the bad behavior starts and ruins it for all.

Of course every child in every family has that issue at one time or another. I remember many a game night ruined by a bioson temper tantrum and sore losing. Many a trip to a restaurant was also ruined by a mopey kid. (This place smells funny, I don't like this, my stomach hurts, I didn't want to come anyway)

I guess as a parent you want to enjoy fun things with your children and provide your child something to do aside from staying home all the time. In this AZ heat it is even more important to find things to do that are inside. Which usually has an additional expense associated with it. In 120 degree heat your free options are few and far between. Simple things that keep the kids busy and that they enjoy are usually off the agenda. I mean you just can't go to a park or ride a bike without fear of third degree burns or heatstroke. Heck even swimming is not an option at this high temp because the water feels like bath water and has no cooling affect.

So we plan other things...

Then comes the self-regulation issues that get in the way, as does a child's clear open defiance. Social anxiety and awkwardness take the fun out of spontaneous things as well, but planning something sometimes makes it even worse because of the anxious anticipation associated with doing something completely new.

So when the behavior leading up to an already paid for event is HORRIBLE do you really want to go? I am trying so hard to deal with it, get over it, move on, and try again. But seriously it's pretty hard when any moment now you are waiting for the other shoe to drop... could it be behind door number 1, 2, or 3?


Noobs to Foster care beware! ;-)


PS: I have started looking into a "Parenting Traumatized Children" class) I need to work on my skills! I have also read a ton of books and continue to look for information on how others deal with it.

I want to practice the "stop yelling" method but with 1 hard of hearing child it's like she begs me to yell so she can say I did and I fall for it every time.