Sharing technology

I love technology. My daughter sent me a text video of her using the Doppler I bought her and you can hear the baby's heartbeat. It's amazing the things smart phones have allowed us to share from over 1100 miles away.  It's definitely not the same as being there and I do plan on making a few trip there before the baby comes and especially after it comes.  Grandparenting from afar was not how I thought this would be though. So it's bittersweet all in all.

Thanksgiving was a bust

i had to work on Wed night and Thurs night, so we decided to have dinner on Friday. My son, his wife, my mom and nephew. Hubby and the babies. But t even while cooking staying awake was hard. Even harder was staying awake after dinner. I just couldn't.

Thanksgiving used to be dinner and games... But with my daughter not here this year and still mourning my Dad, it was just a pretty crappy day.

I don't have to work Christmas so here's hoping we have a better day, but the scene will still be the same.

Where is...

insert one of four names now because you could be asking that question about any of the kids now. If Mac is not hooked up to his feeding and safely tucked into a chair, swing or jumper, he's rolling around his floor and under things. Semira is climbing on something, destroying a path of something in her way and generally toddeling around the house. David is crawling everywhere now. If a light pops on he follows to wherever it may lead. Into the bathroom, his siblings rooms, the laundry room, a closet, out the doggy door... You get the picture. Emily has been mobile for so long we are used to that. She continues to get into everything, but she's playing with purpose now too so that's awesome.

Life with 4 "toddlers" is busy busy busy

Adult children

Need a little attention here. My daughter is a nervous wreck over the baby coming. Mostly because there are so many things that can go wrong and she's so excited about getting to be a Mommy. She's almost 11 weeks now. She just got a new job, out of the classroom and into administration so hopefully that helps some. She still has bouts of nausea and vomiting, along with motion sickness and chasing three year old around all day is too much for her. With the new job will come insurance but in the meantime we found a place that will provide free prenatal care for her until 30 weeks. I also bought her a Doppler so hopefully all is well and we will get to hear the baby heartbeat soon snd maybe take some of the worry away.

My son has finally moved into his house. He starts school in January but he wants to also apply to the Police Department. His wife is pissed. They fight. Not a new issue. But they live closer now do I get dragged in. She's dramatic and has high clinical intervention levels of anxiety.  He's  an asshole plain and simple and needs to mature more.  He wants an exciting career and she wants a baby desperately. I think they need to grow up a lot first, despite being married for three years.   I'm very happy he's home. I love them both, I'm not happy that their fighting contains a lot of divorce talk and storming off. But I don't like getting texts about him "putting his hand on her" while at work... Only to find out by both that it was more his hand were on my arms as we yelled at each other face to face until he stormed off. Right or wrong, you don't throwing that around, domestic violence is serious. I honestly think they are just not right for each other somedays.

I'm an adult kid too. I'm stressed beyond belief because my mothers blood pressures are dangerously high. Stroke high. Just like my Dad the year before he passed. I have this de ja vu thing because I remember vividly the "screwy blood pressures" he'd talk about. She's also depressed because it's finally sunk in he's not coming back and we'll we all know holidays suck too and add to it. Work sux, the babies are busy and there is just so much to do.

So I worry, get little sleep and bitch and moan. You should see my blood pressure.

Raising special kids

Raising a blind child is hard. Besides all the other complicating factors related to vision and education, the mobility right now is the one that breaks my heart. David has started to crawl, pull to stand and cruise the furniture. What breaks my heart is when he bumps his head into stuff when crawling. He cries and rubs it and just breaks my heart. I wish I could just put a bubble around him but I know I can't. But this mamma finds it so hard to not treat him more fragile than our little girl who can see.

Psst...

Our family is expanding. Confirmed via ultrasound today... I'm going to be a Grandmother finally! My daughter, who married in July, is expecting her first child and is due in June.

Such happy happy news.

Expanding

Our family may or may not be expanding next year.... Stay tuned.

It just irks the crap outta me -National Adoption Month Story

It's National adoption month!! A certain page, who also makes hamburgers, shares stories of awesome people. But today, today I am a little off center about one.  Why is there a go fund me page for every time something like life happens for people?  I get it unexpected expenses like a loss etc. community comes together.  But it really irks me that its news that a family who private adopts infants domestically, and sibs out of foster care within 24 hours is magically a charity case that needs crowd funding?  We have 4 special needs children, three are 2 years old now! We adopted two on the same day and it was dramatic and their stories are sad but are their stories... We didn't set up a page. Heck those people even probably got a baby shower to celebrate at least the two newborns coming into their family.  We ran around trying to get extra baby everything and cribs when we were placed with unexpected infants x three. Oh they had fertility issues, well I had cancer we found during infertility treatments! Ok am I bitchy yup. How you grew your family and the circumstances are a story of life and how you were blessed with amazing littles girls to raise... do not equate with a need to crowd fund your family.  It's not like they appeared on your doorstep 4 at once and the state walked away and said good luck you are on your own out of the blue one day.

Macs Birth Mom

Called me today to ask if I've talked to the CASA worker about getting a pic of the other baby for her because today is his birthday. I told her on the 1st to call the Case Worker to get a visit so she could see him. They severed her rights but they have to give her a goodbye visit if she asks, plus she may be able to get the same set up we have where we send her pics of him. I do not know who has the baby. I don't know anything about them. I already feel bad that we couldn't keep the boys together, but seriously these dark circles under my eyes are already deep with what we have and my job.  She really should have had her own Law Guardian.

Subsidy drama

Adopting special needs kids out of foster care this time around has been a big cluster f to say the least. Why? Because we moved into a county that is apparently controlled by dumbasses in another county two hours away, who either have a different set of guidelines or are just plain stupid. Either way it's caused a snag because we let our license lasp and they want to only give the regular rate not the DDD/medfrag rate. It's about $10 a day difference. Does it matter really? No, but they are being ignorant of the facts and that does matter. SSI might be a better route for him because he's entitled to just as much as his siblings.

Forward

Spoke with the lawyer yesterday with regard to Macs case. The papers will be in the mail to us shortly. The subsidy should be done as well. We qualify for expedited court date so it could be before the end of the year or right after the first of the year, depending on the availability of the courts. National adoption day would be nice seeing as though it's our final adoption, but probably not the best idea with our group. We shall see.